Twisted:strained or wrenched out of normal shape. News, comments, pictures, videos and rants on any and all subjects including my life. PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS & FEEDBACK.
7.03.2007

Several pic's from a day hike up to Deer Mt. Carrie and I left out with a group of twelve or so but did not make the summit. Being from Minneapolis where the elevation is around 800ft a climb in high elevation to 13,700 proved to much on only the second day. Carrie came down with some altitude sickness and that was the end of our climb... we headed down and waited for the rest of the group.

Ok I've told you we went on a trip and promised some pic's well here is the start... this one is just so you know where er were. Estes Colorado, YMCA of the Rockies to be precise. I know you may not think of the YMCA as a resort but this one can be. It provides a ton of things to do and in the most beautiful settings! So enjoy the pic's
6.30.2007
I spend everyday dealing with complete cockbites, only to come home and deal with one more cockbite fucktard, and I'm tired of it. For once, I want something to look forward to, and it's certaintly not going to be my job.
So if someone has suggested that you should be on America's Top Model, or could be (better yet, have been) in Playboy, than you may just have what it takes to be my next roommate.
In all fairness though, it will take more than just being a scorching hottie to be my roommate, it will also take $700 every month. You will also have to put up with the following:
My friends will always be over to check you out
I will always be trying to check you out
I will move all of your food to the bottom drawer of the refridgerator, just so I can watch you bend over and get it (Oh, yeah! Get those apples from the crisper, you dirty girl!)
I will make every attempt possible to 'accidently' bump into you as you are on your way out of the shower.
I will constantly try to get you drunk so that I can advantage of you. Sadly, in attempting this, I will get"
To read the rest, click above. (It's funny) Oh and by the way I'm back from Colo. so pic's and stories over the weekend!
6.15.2007
Baby monitor picks up live NASA video - USATODAY.com
I wonder how much $$$ NASA spends on it's monitors and how much $$$ it could save buy buying baby monitors?
Nick Coleman: Minneapolis in trouble? Then bash the beggars
"'Calling all cars, calling all cars: Citizens report a surly beggar at 9th and Hennepin.
'Oh, yes, there's also a double homicide on Broadway.'"
6.14.2007
Bush robbed? Not on my watch! | Oddly Enough | Reuters
Now, why couldn't they steal Bush and leave the U.S. the watch! (Yes, I know the watch was not stolen; Bush just chose to insult Albanians by implying they are thieves. Of course we all know who the biggest thief is, the one who stole an election, our good image and our civil rights!)
6.11.2007
Californians may be forced to neuter pets | Oddly Enough | Reuters
Next on the agenda is the forced neutering of all Republicans ;)
6.06.2007
Eating live frogs, rats cures tummy upsets | Oddly Enough | Reuters
Eating mushrooms and licking frogs will make you forget about that tummy and about anything else also;)
5.30.2007
This loser tried to swindle and elderly woman but thanks to some "Minnesota Nice" people he was stopped in his tracks. Would you step up if you saw this happen?
kare11.com :: KARE 11 TV - Man first cons, then swindles elderly Minneapolis woman:
MyFox Twin Cities | Minneapolis Woman Charged in $2.5 Million Check Cashing
Has she never heard the saying "take the money and run!!!" Belize here I come!. I really don't know what I would do, yes I would be tempted but in the end I would do the right thing... I think?
5.29.2007
You have to see this, I learned a lot from it...
5.26.2007
BlogCatalog Bloggers for Good Fundraising Challenge
Do you remember that teacher who changed every thing for you? Was it the English teacher who told you that you have a novelist/poet stuck inside of you? Or that math teacher who pushed you just a little harder till you found your inner Steven Hawkins? For me it was Miss. Rood, my 2nd and 3rd grade teacher that introduced me to Museums and art galleries on field trips and gave me the confidence to strive for what I want. Now it's time to pay them back... go HERE.
DonorsChoose is a simple way to provide students in need with resources that our public schools often lack.
Here, teachers submit ideas for materials or experiences that their students need to learn. Individuals like you can choose a project and make it a classroom reality.
5.25.2007
3D Animation of Vaginal Child Birth
Just Watch... I'm not sure why. If your a guy you need to see this (so you know that you MUST buy your wife something nice) and if your a pregnant woman you may want a c-section instead.
Congressman chases down pick-pocket | Oddly Enough | Reuters
How embarrassing for the 18 yr old thief to be ran down by a 61yr old, his time in jail will not be fun.
Swarm of bees forces passenger plane to land | Oddly Enough | Reuters
Now we know what happened to all those missing bees. They ahve developed a thirst for British beer and are drunkly flying into planes!
5.23.2007
Apolo Theater | Dancing With the Stars (Season 4 -- Episode 410A) | TV Watch | TV | Entertainment Weekly: "Apolo Anton Ohno" Has won dancing with the kinda stars...
And Jordin triumphs as youngest Idol ever.

Sorry folks but this is so, funny but true.
PS From Carrie, Mitt Romney, what kind of name is that? Shit Romney.. eeerrr I mean oven mitt now wait I mean...........
5.22.2007
Man busted while drunk driving in wheelchair | Oddly Enough | Reuters
5.19.2007
Digg - Doctors May Be Third Leading Cause of Death
Doctors Are The Third Leading Cause of Death in the US, Causing 250,000 Deaths Every Year This week's issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA)
5.18.2007

Shrek the turd...eeerrr I mean the Third, or do I? As a devotee to the Shrek movies I had to see the Third and as a devotee I liked it. As a stand alone movie... I would pass or wait for the DVD. Slow, dark with a weak plot and soundtrack. The bad soundtrack is the most disappointing... you have been warned.
PS Happy birthday Carrie my love & best friend! (not to mention my wife)
5.17.2007
Fun videos - Merry Christmas |
Merry Christmas
This girl is singing something... but I forget what it is ;)
Ok Carrie and I are having a little tiff over this one, she wants me to take it down and asks"Why are men so obsessed with boobs?" So leave us your opinion in the comments section.
5.16.2007
Train passengers asked to get out and push | Oddly Enough | Reuters



This reminds me of a train trip I took in 1994. The trains locomotive failed and we where stranded outside of a small town in Georgia called, if I remember right, Mound. The towns mayor and citizens greeted us with open arms by opening city hall (it was a Sunday) and the womans auxiliary showed up with tons of food, apple pies, cakes , lasagna etc... it was great. They even allowed us to use the phones to call family to let them know we where all right but would be late, very late. After several hours Amtrak came up with two plans to get us to our destination (New Orleans) the first was to wait several more hours for buses to show up and drive us the rest of the way. The second plan was for those adventurous souls who would not mine riding on a train with no electricity. A freight engine had been brought in to bring the train to New Orleans but because the fright engine and the passenger cars use different electrical systems there would be no power. The temperature was a humid ninety plus and there would be no AC or food! So after a quick run to the local store for food and beverages ;) a few hearty souls headed out on the crippled train, myself included. It was dark, hot and very weird. The only light came from back up batteries between the car sections, so of course this is where we all congregated. It turned out to be the best part of my trip. I met a ton of people and we had a party, the beer eerr, I mean beverages where drank fast so that they would not get too warm, food was shared and memories where made. To the cute blond from Sweden, sorry I did not find you in LA a week latter and too the middle aged man from Dallas who bewildered all of us with is ventriloquism, you made our night.
On a side note I just found out that one of my most favorite/ridiculed authors is very ill and has been for a while. For any who do not know Robert Jordan the author of the endless tomes call the Wheel of Time series is suffering from Amyloidosis. My good wishes and prayers go out to you and your family, good luck.
5.11.2007
BERLIN (Reuters) - The decomposed corpse of a German man was found alone in his bed after nearly seven years, police in the western city of Essen said Thursday. Next to the dead man's bed police found cigarettes, an open television guide.
And here is another one:
Bank sells house complete with owner's corpse
updated 5.16.07
5.09.2007
Tampabay: Artist's work looked familiar
A quote by Jim Benton
5.07.2007
Green Bay Press-Gazette - Police Calls
— Ashwaubenon Public Safety Department"
5.04.2007

THE FUTURE
Admittedly, our niche role in the human species might seem marginal, quaint, or even silly at the present time, if you're of a very boring, practical, and short-sighted mindset.
But just wait … wait until the whole world is a giant post-nuclear wasteland populated by clashing tribes of biker warriors all battling over some rare and precious resource like gas or water or fertile women. Then, let me tell ya, the instincts we refused to squelch, the fears that we trained ourselves to ignore, and the skills that we honed in the lost spaces of cities are all going to prove invaluable. And the bozos who didn't get it are going to be sitting on the radioactive surface scratching their tumors and gnawing on rat bones left behind by mutant cockroaches, while WE rule the mighty underground cities that we forged in the lost remains of massive subterranean military installations.
If they're really lucky, maybe we'll allow them to fight one another to the death in the post-apocalyptic gladiator-style games we run for entertainment in order to placate the masses. And all kinds of tough scantily-clad post-apocalypse babes will beg to reproduce with us.
Totally.
This is taken from those great urban explorers here in Minneapolis, The Action Squad!
5.03.2007
TwinCities.com - Minneapolis / Strip club chain may buy Schieks after all
YOUR TAX MONEY AT WORK!
Minneapolis sent two officers on a cross-country trip to tour seven of the chain's strip clubs. Grant Wilson, of the licensing department, traveled with police investigator David Rodriguez on a four-day trip in late March and early April to get a peek at the sexual contact between customers and employees, customers being allowed to touch their breasts and simulated sex in their laps, stuff like that, "Most guys think it would be a dream assignment, but it was very grueling,' given the late nights, the documentation involved and the travel between two states, he said."
(I did edit the above to tickle the funny bone just a little.)
5.02.2007
Ok folks (like anyone is gonna actually read this after a three month poof, but here goes) I'm back. My DSL arrived yesterday and here I am. I had a lot of funny pic's and comments stored up but they all seem way to stale now. I even thought about tossing in the towel on this blog and starting new. But it's way to long in the works, so I'll just start plodding along with the pic's and stuff.
So whats new, well Carrie the wife has a new job taking care of squishies or at least that is what she calls them. Squishies are babies, you know those little versions of you and I that we all hope turn out better than we did even though they have the disadvantage of your illegal drug/alcohol/prescription drug/environmentally poisoned polluted genes and mental instability. I on the other hand have chosen to embark on a great new adventure, I'm headed back to school )after fourteen years) to get my MBA and working through a temp agency for spending change. Till later, cya.
Myths replace facts in honeybee decline
U.S. Department of Agriculture top bee researcher Jeff Pettis sys that bees are out creating crop circles "and it's working them to death."
2.06.2007
PS Still on dial-up so things are slow... but everything is good. Now all I need is a new job to go along with my decision to head back to school for my MBA... so long to the hotel business (I may work in one while in school but I will not be staying, fourteen years is long enough!)
1.06.2007
12.11.2006

Mom: Talking Doll Called My Daughter 'a Slut'
(click pic for ABC's test video)
By MIRI MARSHALL
Dec. 10, 2006 — It's supposed to say sweet things to little girls like, "You're a wonderful friend," but push its button the wrong way and the Little Mermaid Shimmering Lights Ariel doll may say something else — "You're a slut," according to a California mother whose allegation came to light in a newspaper report.
I thought it was only the Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan dolls that where supposed to do that?12.07.2006
1)At one of my last jobs I had a waiter who pretended to be British and faked his accent and background. It was funny whenever he got upset (which was often) the accent would suddenly disappear and his voice would go up three octaves. He was actually from Wisconsin!
2)Another coworker changed his name and refused to acknowledge anyone who called him by his given name, this included his mother when she visited him at work. He also is a drama queen from Wisconsin! What makes people from Wisconsin so ashamed of their state that they want to reinvent themselves???
3)Then there was the hypochondriac who one day when I walked behind the front desk of the hotel, she had three pill bottles out, was on the phone with her doctors office and had a light box with a reflector shinning on her to treat her SAD. When ever the news reported on some new and bizarre illness she would come down with it!
4)There was many years ago the day care worker who I heard from everyday when I dropped of my niece. She lived with her boyfriend, his two ex girlfriends, their kids, his best friend, brother, mom, grandmother and the grandmothers drunken boyfriend in a two bedroom condo. Everyday she would complain about her living condition to everyone. Thank God I only had to listen to it five minutes a day. I always felt sorry for her coworkers one of which was the boyfriend!
We could go on, the hotel and restaurant business is full of strange drama queens... not to mention the guests.
12.06.2006
My heart & prayers goes out to the Kim family. You all have shown such courage and strength during the ordeal. For those who may not have heard this family of four was returning home after Thanksgiving and became stranded in the Oregon mountains. Three family members where rescued on Monday (Dec. 4th!) . James Kim an editor at Cnet had headed out on Saturday by foot to look for help. His body was located this afternoon.

Ogling Breasts Makes Men Live Longer
This is not a joke. It came from the New England Journal of Medicine.
Great news for girl watchers: Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his life, medical experts have discovered. According to the New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out" declared gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby.
Dr. Weatherby and fellow researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, reached the startling conclusion after comparing the health of 200 male outpatients - half of whom were instructed to look at busty females daily, the other half told to refrain from doing so. The study revealed that after five years, the chest-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease.
"Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation," explains Dr. Weatherby. "There's no question: Gazing at breasts makes men healthier." "Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half. We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life four to five years."
Is this to good too be true?
12.05.2006

Thanks waiter for bringing this to my attention. Now everyone call your congressman before you start drinking and ask for his help in making this happen;)
Repeal Day
Repeal Day (December 5th) is not celebrated by anyone in this country, yet it is the only day which truly has any connection with alcohol. December 5th is the anniversary of the day the United States repealed the Eighteenth Amendment and gave us all the constitutional right to consume alcohol. I’ve been celebrating Repeal Day for years by forcing this information down the throats of my customers, and now I’m forcing it on you. Here are a few reasons why I think Repeal Day should be a major drinking holiday in the United States.
(Click the text for the reasons!)
12.02.2006
11.28.2006

Troy Gentry, the famous country singer plead guilty to a misdemeanor of improper tagging a bear that he had murdered with a bow. This does not sound so bad till you learn that he had bought and shot the bear in a three acre pen enclosed by an electric fence. Part of the purchase agreement with the owner and hunting? guide was that they would claim it was shot in the wild. He also had a video made that was edited to show a wild hunt!
Mr. Gentry you are a liar and either lazy or a coward. I hope to god all of your buddies who I'm sure you told a great story of the bear hunt too give you shit. You are too lazy to go and hunt for a bear in a more fair? environment or you are scared shitless that the bear may take you out. Either way you have lost at least one fan who will not listen or buy another ticket or CD.
Disclaimer: I listen and love country music. I have hunted in the past but do not now, I do understand the thrill and sometimes need of hunting. But those who hunt trapped or baited animals are murderers and give ALL hunters a bad name!
11.27.2006
A zillion dollars per an acre of woods sounds about right to me. Urban sprawl has ate up acreage all around the twin cities. It used to be "in olden times... twenty years ago" that a half hour drive in any direction would put you in farm country. Now I think all the farms have moved to the Dakotas. I miss the farms, the open land and open lots in the city where a kid could make believe he was in another world. Now all the old open lots are home to brand new condos and townhomes.PS I hope your Thanksgiving was good, I know mine was. A little to much rich food left me with a grumpy stomach, but that and shopping is what Thanksgiving is about... right?
11.22.2006
11.20.2006
11.19.2006
This is for all those who waited days & hours outside in lines taking vacation days or calling in sick (not to mention paying thousands of $$$ on EBAY) to get their PS3! Video!
Cat gives birth to puppies! (maybe?)
Another article about the Government looking for handouts via: sponsorships! What's next, the Whitehouse being sponsered by Martha Stewart?
11.15.2006
Idiot of the week goes too: Lesley Stevenson, who marries the man who shot her!
On to other news, the boulder has passed. Yes that pesky kidney stone hung around... forever! Of course as things must happen, I was at Target when I passed the first two of three stones. The person in the stall next to mine must have had some strange visions of what was going on in my stall with all the grunting, yelping and a few moans!
11.11.2006

Ok, Carrie and I are watching Carson Daily with guest Tom Arnold. Tom looks like, sounds like he is on something or having a breakdown. Rambling and making no sense, he can't sit still and has this lost & deer in head lights look. This breaks my heart for I have met Tom on two occasions and really liked him. I always found him to be very funny and a decent actor. He fell apart when Carson asked about Tom's breakup with his wife, who Tom says he is still living with and then babbled on about being worth more dead than alive??? I hope things turn around for him. Good luck Tom, get some help.
11.08.2006
Congrats to Democrats nationwide, it looks like we did it. The house and most likely the Senate will swing to our control. It's time for a reckoning!
On the local (Minnesota) side it looks just as good. All of our family and friends have won by large margins. There are two defeats that do hurt. We missed picking up the governorship by a few thousand votes (at last count) . Also in the Bachmann, Wetterling race the Republican Bachmann defeats Wetterling for the US House seat.
And congrats to Britney Spears for finally coming to your senses. He no good for you...
11.07.2006
I've been laid up for a week with kidney stones (NO the boulder still has not passed). I've had stones once before in my life, 14 yrs ago. I keep trying to remember what happened back then. How long after the pain moved there did it take till it was over? etc etc I just hope this passes and soon. Our already over stretched budget can not take me being off much longer. (FYI work told me not to come back till it was over. I tried on Friday and they were not amused by the yelps and moans during my constant bathroom runs.)
11.03.2006
Idiot of the week: Oscar Aponte. This ex prison inmate, took with him a prison uniform when he was released in September. He wore the uniform as his Halloween costume. When he was spotted it caused the prison to be locked down. He has been charged with a couple of crimes. I hope this does not violate his parole or even worse. Does NY have a three strike law? If it does it would be ironic and sad if this was his third strike.
11.02.2006
OK, I'm a little late on finding out about these guys. They call themselves Hitch50. They are trying to hitchhike to the capitals of all fifty states. As of yesterday they are stuck in Juneau Alaska and have hit 29 states in 24 days. Good luck guys, maybe I'll see you here in the Twin Cities.
11.01.2006
This has to be the most disgusting, sickening political commercial out there. Mr. Vernon Robinson has not missed a single inflammatory issue in his attack on the public's common sense and good taste.
Now here is a question, he touts all that he finds wrong in America and how he will bring conservative Republican values to Congress. But have not the Republicans controlled this country now for six years and failed to "improve" on Mr. Robinson's issues. Mr. Robinson it's not you that we need in office but someone with morals and the drive to work for a better USA instead of his own warped view's.
Now I need to go take a bath, just watching that commercial has left me filling dirty.
updated Nov. 8th,2006
We where shocked, this was our first Halloween in the house and we did not know what to expect. Almost seventy kids by 8:30 when we ran out of candy. (Carrie, quick turn off the lights and get in the house. I'm not going to spend another $40 for candy, even if I could find some.)
10.29.2006
Masturbation is good for you!
Naked burglar!
A new danger of shrinkage (this is for the men!).
The Idiots of the Week are Mrs. C A woman married for 17 yrs who did not realise her "husband" had no penis and was actually a woman.
And this guy! Who cut of his ring finger with his wedding ring still attached just to spit his ex-wife!
10.27.2006
Here, is a site with a ton of fun, funny and risque public art. Warning it does take forever to load but it's worth it.
10.26.2006
(Pic borrowed from Hideaway Pictures)So it's almost that time of year again so I better get ready.
No! Not Halloween but NaNoWriMo! I failed miserably last year writing only a few hundred lines before work washed away all the available time that I had. What am I talking about? National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo for short, if that is short?) where people from around the world each try to write a 50,000 word novel in one month. Rewards? Only Karma and a pat on the back. Wish me luck!
10.25.2006

Election time is almost here thank god. No, I'm not that excited about voting. I just want the f@&king commercials to end. It does not matter what party I side with, both sides are running disgusting attack ads non-stop here in Minnesota and I'm sick of it! Here in Minnesota we actually do have a major (kind of) third party with the boring name of the Independence Party (think of Jesse "The Body" Ventura as our Gov., yep were weird up here.). Their commercials usually are at least funny.

























